Adopt a lifestyle not a craze; it's a constant not a phase.
Lauren Larsen
So, you've found yourself here on the Ensemble blog, let's make a few assumptions before we begin. You are here because you want to be a better man. This website, as well as Lauren, are great assets to improving your physical self. But remember if you're only trying to change your style you're simply slapping a new coat of paint on an old house. I am going to let you in on a few secrets that have changed my life and lead my progression in becoming an overall better man, which is ultimately the end goal.
Becoming a better man starts on the inside. Take some time to reflect on where you are now and where you would like to be a year or two down the road. Think about things like; How charitable am I? How do I treat the people in my life that matter the most? How am I perceived among my peers? These are hard questions and the more realistic you can be with your answers the easier it will be to gauge your success. Join clubs and align yourself with people that you would like to become. There are some great fraternal or charitable organizations that are very active in this city and they can always use some young blood. Get in there, participate and listen to the members as they will be generous in their advice and can act as mentors in your pursuit. I am an active member in the Freemasons and the Bow River Progress Club I have not only met some very influential people but the members hold me to an obligation in becoming a better man. And that aligns with my vision of who I want to become.
"GOOD ARTISTS COPY, GREAT ARTISTS STEAL."
It is rumored that Picasso once said "Good artists copy, great artists steal." This can be in regards to fashion, your lifestyle, your business persona and your love life. Use the little things that you see and admire as inspiration and work them into your life. I used to watch my dad open the door for any women or girl irregardless of who it was or which door they were going through, car doors, building doors any door. I used to admire the gratitude the older women would show and to this day I do the same. I also used to work for a man who would come into his office each morning and say hello and chat with everyone, from the top to bottom, sometimes it would take him half of an hour hour, but when he finally found his office he would shut the door and gather himself planning out his day and making a to-do list. I have implemented this into my routine and find it reduces my stress and increases my productivity exponentially. Keep an eye out for the people you admire and pay attention to the things that they do, the way they carry themselves and how they treat others. It's the little things you pick up along the way and implement into your life that make you the man that you are, and in theory if you imitate the qualities of better man, you yourself will be headed in the same direction.
"FAKE IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT."
Be humble in your pursuit. I can't stress the importance of this enough, especially for people who have done a tremendous amount of work to get where they are. Keep in mind you can always be better - jealousy is not a productive emotion. Be supportive and humble, give your input if it is asked for, and keep your criticisms to yourself. I try to make time to read the book "How To Win Friends And Influence People" by Dale Carnegie at least once a year. It is a great way to reflect on conflict resolution and will make you better and dealing with people in your life. Becoming a better man is a difficult journey and you are going to be proud of how far you have come. Keep an eye on those gentlemen you admire, chances are they are confident when they need to be and disarmingly humble when they don't.
Remember to be patient. This is a long term goal. Use reflection methods, create a memory board with tickets to concerts, sporting events, love letters and anything to remind you how much fun you've had and how far you've come. Instagram is a great way to reflect on your progression, take some time to look back on the pictures and make sure you are heading in the right direction. My Instagram tells an incredible journey filled with laughter and love, adventures, friends and family, and all in all, the progression that has taken me from the man I was 200 weeks ago to the man that I am today. Remember the best way to see into the future is to look at the past, be your own critic and keep yourself honest. But at the same time...
Ignore the boo's, they come from the cheap seats. The better you get the more you will hear. Don't get upset, don't take it to heart and by all means don't get discouraged. People are inherently jealous (for the most part) and the more success you are experiencing the more they will want to pull you down to their level. Simply ignore this. The less time you spend thinking about the negatives the less chance they will have of manifesting into your life and slowing your progress. The quest to becoming a better man is not easy but it will be one of the most rewarding things you can do. Ignore the boo's, trust me.
"IGNORE THE BOOS, THEY COME FROM THE CHEAP SEATS."
In my pursuit of becoming a better man I have seen an overall improvement in almost every aspect of my life. My relationships are stronger and I find myself not settling for mediocre matches, in both friendship and love departments. My business life has never been more promising, I find my clients craving my input in their projects and my services are in high demand. Additionally, my wardrobe has changed significantly and is constantly evolving. I find myself buying pieces that would have scared my 150 week ago Instagram self. The more confident you become, the less scared you are to wear something that doesn't blend in with the crowd.
I am more confident in my demeanor and I have a lot of fun with it, but most importantly my relationships with those who matter have never been better and I've lost touch with the ones who don't. This is a good thing. When you're busy and your life is progressing, your relationships and the people who spend your time with should evolve too.
When you wake up in the morning, I encourage you to intentionally strive to be a better man, and I challenge you to make it a priority in your New Year!